LACKS: The Search for SVClark
by baudyhallee
Summary: Three live action Clark Kents search for Smallville's Clark Kent to get his side of the story for his Lois Lane's exile to Star City. What could possibly separate a Clark from his Lois? From an arid crater to the Kent farm to the FOS, they search.


**LACKS: The Search for SVClark**

Rated PG-13

Disclaimer: I own nothing except a desire to save SV Clark and SV Lois.

S8 SPOILERS!!! Do not read further if you're not into spoilers.

**So there won't be any confusion. These are the Players:**

**LACKS – Live Action Clark Kent Society**

**NNLois is Noel Neill's Lois Lane in the Adventures of Superman television series (NN)**

**GRClark is George Reeves' Clark Kent in the Adventures of Superman television series (GR)**

**MKLois is Margot Kidder's Lois Lane in the Superman movies (MK)**

**CRClark is Christopher Reeve's Clark Kent in the Superman movies (CR)**

**THLois is Terri Hatcher's Lois Lane in the New Adventures of Lois and Clark tv series (TH)**

**DCClark is Dean Cain's Clark Kent in the New Adventures of Lois and Clark tv series (DC)**

**EDLois is Erica Durance's Lois Lane in the Smallville tv series (ED)**

**TWClark is Tom Welling's Clark Kent in the Smallville tv series (TW) **

CRClark flew high over the Earth using his super-vision to try and find TWClark. It had been weeks since any of the LACKS team had heard from the Smallville Clark. Not even EDLois knew where or what he was doing at the moment since she had been exiled to Star City to take care of AAJimmy.

CR soared over some arid mountains. It felt good to fly and enjoy a sunny day, but not even the joyful sound of his cape flapping in the wind could squelch the uneasiness in his gut.

"GR, report in," said DCClark. CR's superhearing picked up his fellow Clarks' conversation half way around the world. He was not patrolling alone.

"Nothing here. You don't suppose he's encased in lead somewhere?" said the voice of the other Silver Age Clark.

"Possibility, but why? Why would he go into hiding?" said the Modern Age Clark. "CR? Anything on your end?"

"No . . . hey, wait a minute . . ." said CR as he spotted a figure in a cloud of dust moving too quickly for a human. It was heading for a crater. He projected his telescopic vision and noticed whatever it was, it was not wearing red or blue. "Something suspicious. Going in to check it out."

CR hovered in the air just a matter of yards from a girl/woman who began superdigging into the Earth. "Miss?"

Her dark brown hair reminded him of Medusa and she had a maniacal gleam in her eye. "Power. I need power!" She kept up her compulsive digging until she reached in and lifted a giant meteor over her head. "Power. . . Power . . . Power."

"Miss, I don't think you want to do that . . ." but before he could say another word he plummeted out of the sky and painfully fell on the harsh terrain. The spasms in his body were excruciating and his brain flashed warnings through his mind. _KRYPTONITE!_ As he looked up, the girl/woman absorbed the radiation from the meteor and turned green for an instant. "Who . . . are . . . you?" He tried to straighten his body but it refused to leave a fetal position.

"Power! I am SVLana and I have POWER!" She said as she tossed the ten ton rock aside as if it were a feather. Then she took a step towards him and his pain increased.

"Stay . . . away!" He managed to spit out as she drew nearer.

"Power. . . Power. . . Power," she said as she was about to touch him.

"You're . . . killing . . . me!" he screamed in anguish.

She stopped short and gave him a gamine grin. "I'm going to save people now," she whispered breathily as she supersped away.

"DC . . . help!" he managed as the voices of his team became his lifeline. "Loooisss."

"GR!" shouted DC as their voices began to fade in his mind.

"On it! I'm closer!" said GR with reassuring confidence.

"We'll meet at the Kent barn," said the Modern Age Clark in a worried voice.

It seemed like an eternity before GR reached him, but CR knew it was only a matter of seconds.

"CR!" exclaimed the elder Clark as he gathered him into his arms. "What happened?"

CR grabbed the big red S on GR's uniform screaming the one thought that struck fear in his heart. "SVLana is Kryptonite!!!"

The tranquility of the Kent farm gave very little comfort. There was an ominous, eerie silence. The barn that supposedly had been trashed was now in pristine condition and fully functional. It was a puzzlement and yet a possible clue. The other disturbing find was the bed in the main bedroom was shattered. DC could see TWClark's DNA as well as what appeared to be a genetically altered female human's on the sheets. Shaking his head with confusion and disgust DC waited for his fellow Clarks to arrive. As they approached, CR was still leaning against GR trying to get his breath.

"Are you okay?" asked the Modern Age Clark.

"He keeps babbling about SVLana . . . being kryptonite," said GRClark propping up CR.

"I'll be. . . okay. She. . . doesn't even. . . have red hair," he gasped trying to stand on his own two feet. "More like . . .garter snakes . . .crawling over her head."

"What?" said DCClark as his mind went back to the bedroom clues and his stomach rolled over. "What the hell is going on around here?"

"Woof!"

The three Clarks turned to see a dog happily wagging his tail.

"Shelby?" grinned a recovering CR. "Is that you, boy?"

"Woof," barked the dog again as his tongue slid out of the side of his open smile while panting.

CR fell to his knees and immediately began to pet the canine. It seemed to heal him. "It's so good to see you!" He said as the dog licked his face. "Good boy!"

"Uhhh, what about Krypto?" asked DC as he too began to pet the dog.

CR shook his head. "I had Shelby on the farm when I was a boy."

GR stood nearby rubbing his chin in thought. "I wonder if this dog is like Lassie or Rin Tin Tin? Maybe he could tell us where TWClark is." CR and DC looked at each other and then at GR.

"You mean like, 'Timmy is down in the well on Farmer John's back forty by highway 16 just where the railroad track crosses' . . . " grinned DC.

"Yea, yea. Smart Alec. Just like that. What could it hurt? We don't have any leads so far . . . except SVLana is kryptonite. And I'm not even sure what THAT is! It's definitely bizarre!"

"Worth a try," said CR as he stood up to full strength. "C'mon, boy. Show us where Clark is."

Shelby wagged his tail and barked at each one of them.

DC chuckled. "I think you're confusing him."

"Let me show you how it was done in my day," said GR as he knelt beside the dog and rubbed its ears. "Shelby, boy. Go find your Clark. We need to find TWClark."

The happy dog woofed and trotted out of the barn and sat in the middle of the barnyard. His series of barks seemed an indication of some kind.

"Well, he's not barking at the house or the road," said DC as his cape blew in the Kansas breeze.

"What direction is that?" asked GR as he patted Shelby's head. "Good boy."

"North," said CR as his face lit up. "The Fortress. TWClark went to the Fortress of Solitude!"

"The what?" said GR grimacing as if wondering what other weird thing was going to happen.

DC raised up his hands. "Don't look at me. We didn't have it on my show either."

"But you've heard about it surely," said CR as if pleading for their understanding.

"Well, yea, but budgets and storylines being what they were and . . ."

"Oh, c'mon. We've got to find TWClark. I don't want his Lois to suffer anymore than she has to. Show us the way, CR," said GR as they all lifted into air and saluted Shelby for his help.

The three supermen zipped into the crystal ice palace within seconds. CR looked around and smiled. It was so similar to his Fortress. Before any of them could speak, a disembodied voice boomed. "Kal-El, my son."

"Whoa! That's not my father!" said CR as he started backing away. "That sounds like . . ."

"Who the hell is that?" said GR ready to punch something.

"Well, apparently it's not his father," said DC almost chuckling.

"I am Jor-El of Krypton," said the voice.

"That's not my father's voice! He never ever said Kryp-TON. He always said Kryp-TIN!" said CR a bit wild eyed.

"Ha," gaffed DC. "Even I know it's Krypton!"

"Yea," said GR nodding.

"How would you know?" scoffed DC.

"Hey, I read the funny papers," said the elder Clark with his arms crossed.

"I'm telling you he always said Kryp-TIN," growled CR trying to make a point.

DC, who obviously was feeling the effects of this weird day, began to dance and sing an old school rap song. "I'm goin back to Kryptin, Kryptin, Kryptin. I'm goin back to Kryptin . . ."

CR swatted him for his insolence. "I don't think so."

"Enough! We're here! Now what?" huffed GR.

"Kal-El, my son," said the voice again.

"Yea, what?" said GR figuring one son was as good as another.

"You have chased away the Destroyer and defeated the brain interactive construct once again. I thank you for restoring the fortress."

"Okaaay, so apparently TW has been here," said DC looking around.

"Or is still here," said GR as he pointed through a pillar of crystal at a large lead box.

"What in the name of Rao is he doing?" said CRClark as he lifted the lid.

TWClark grabbed the front of his S shirt. "SVLana is kryptonite!!!"

"Yea, I know. Found out the hard way," said CR as he assisted TW from his hiding place. "You could have warned us."

TW shook his head forlornly. "Wasn't time. Jor-El brought me here. I almost died. I was so stupid. They made me . . ."

"Calm down," said GR. "Take some deep breaths and then you can tell us what happened."

"He looks really screwed up," whispered DC to GR out of the side of his mouth.

"I heard that," said TW. "And you're right. I'm so screwed. I don't want Lois to see me like this . . . and after . . . she'll never speak to me again."

The three other Clarks shot sideway glances at one another. Finally CR spoke, "As my Lois would say, 'I sm. . ." Before he could finish another voice was heard.

"There you are!" said EDLois as she appeared in a flash of light along with MK, TH, and NN.

"How did you get here?" yelped DCClark.

"I spoke with ED's cousin until she coughed up the info on this," said TH with a wink and a nod as she showed him an octagonal disk with Kryptonian symbols on it. "Apparently this is the key to the 'Fortress'," she said making quote marks with her fingers as she rolled her eyes.

ED embraced TW in a tight hug as tears formed in his eyes. "Please forgive me. I. . . God, Lois just let me hold you. I'm so sorry," he said as he held onto her for dear life.

"What did they do to you?" she finally said.

"I . . ." he started but was interrupted by NN.

"Give me a turn. Hey, Handsome, you look like hell," said the elder Lois as she hugged him and grinned.

"We've been so worried about you," said TH as she took her turn.

MK hugged him reassuringly. "ED finally got a break from Jimmy. That cousin of hers . . . I guess some people don't believe in the sanctity of marriage." As she pulled away, she sniffed the air. "Dammit! I knew it! I smell SVLana!"

"She's good," said GR as an aside to CR.

"Yea. That's why I love her so much," he grinned. "Be careful, honey, you're breathing in kryptonite."

"What?" said MK as she backed away with disgust on her face.

"Kryptonite?" said EDLois.

"Meteor rock," interpreted TW softly.

"I don't understand," said ED looking from TW to the others.

"Well, we don't thoroughly understand either, but apparently . . ." started DC while TH hugged him and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"SVLana is kryptonite!!!" said GR as he embraced NN tenderly. "And she nearly killed CR."

"That Bitch! I'll KILL her!" screamed MKLois at full throttle rage.

"Now, Lois, you can't be killing people," started CR as he took her into his arms to calm her. "Especially when they are canon characters."

"Bullshit! How the hell did she get to be kryptonite anyway?" she nearly sobbed in anger as her hands roamed over him to be sure he was okay.

"Kal-El, my son," boomed the voice again.

MK spun around so fast it nearly took CR unawares. She splayed her body across his as if wanting to shield him from harm. "Zod! That's General Zod! I'd know that voice anywhere!"

ED looked at the other Lois' silently acknowledging MK's shocked and fearful reaction to the voice. "That can't be good, right?"

TH shook her head and NN hid her face into GR's shoulder as he held her closer.

"It's not Zod. Apparently, it's TW's Jor-El," said CR trying to reassure his Lois.

"That's just sick!" sneered MK as she finally allowed CR to pull her into the safety of his arms.

"Why do I get the feeling it gets worse," said ED to no one in particular.

"Because you know our show," whispered TW as he took the fingers of her one hand into his.

"Kal-El, my son," boomed the voice.

"Oh, shut the hell up!" screeched NN. "Who the hell is that guy anyway? One of the sponsors?"

"It's not CR's father but it might be TW's . . . I think," said GR trying to give her a plausible answer.

"Do you two want to be alone?" asked DC of the Smallville contingent. "I know there's quite a bit to explain."

TW shook his head. "No, better to have everyone hear it all at once. SVLana's already attacked CR. I'm sorry about that."

CR nodded. "I'm sure it wasn't your fault, TW."

"Ha," gaffed ED. "You don't know our show. The writers and producers always make it Clark's fault. And when it concerns SVLana, Clark Kent be damned!"

"Uhh, guys could you hold onto your Lois' for a minute. And, Lois, honey . . . I have something to tell you. It's not going to be good so brace yourself," said TW with all the authority he could muster.

"Clark?" said EDLois as her forehead furrowed and her body involuntarily began to shake.

DC grabbed TH by the arms and held on tight. GR and CR saw his actions and acted in kind. "Go ahead."

"Lois," TW started and gulped. His lower lip quivered. There was an inner strength that supported him, but he was falling apart fast. He knew what he had to do. He had to tell her himself. He took a deep breath. "I had sex with SVLana again."

EDLois grabbed her stomach and fell to the floor gasping for air as sobs emanated from her throat.

MK snarled and struggled against CR's grip. "Bastard!"

TH nearly broke free from DC's hands while kicking the air with her feet. "How dare you!"

NN quivered inside GR's arms tears rolling down her face as she watched the youngest Lois struggle with the pain. "ED?" she said softly.

"Why?" whispered CR in disbelief. "Lois is the best thing that ever happened to a Clark."

"Stupid producers," said GR sadly.

"They broke the bed," said DC staring into space.

"They what?" the others said in unison as EDLois curled into a ball.

TW reached out to her but pulled back as if his touch would not be welcome. "I wondered if one of you found out."

"I was the only one who went into the house," said DC as TH shook in disbelief.

"This cannot be happening," said MK as she looked into her Clark's eyes. "This is not right. It can't be true. Why do they hate us so much?"

"I don't know, my love," said CR as he held her close and rubbed her back.

"I want to go to her," said NN into GR's ear. He released her and she knelt beside the youngest Lois. "C'mere, baby." Her embrace was maternal as she rubbed her back. "You are the brightest and best thing that ever happened to him. Don't think you're second best. That's the farthest from the truth. You are Lois Lane. You matter. For decades you have been by his side. And for decades to come, you will always be his one and only."

ED's sobs filled the Fortess as her companions reflected this sadness and despair that had been thrust upon them.

GR sat beside TW and put an arm around him. "Tell me what happened."

TWClark wiped the tears from his face. "Where do I start? The premise always was 'What if Clark and Lana could be together despite destiny?' Well, it turned out in the end, I wasn't the Clark Kent who became Superman and she wasn't Lana Lang because she's had so many personalities over eight years and then we were separated by destiny anyway. SVLana was supposed to come back for closure this season, but they just made her super with this suit that absorbed kryptonite . . . and . . . why in the hell do I have to explain this crap? I didn't write it!"

GR stared at NN and ED. Even though he and his Lois would never have children, these younger versions were his family. "Go to her, TW. Try to explain it to her. You're both hurt. Heal each other."

"What if . . ." began TWClark.

"No 'what ifs'. That's what got you into trouble in the first place. Follow your heart," said the older, wiser Clark Kent.

TWClark took the few steps to his Lois. "Lois?"

ED tried to snuggle closer to NN using her as a shield.

He knelt beside her, his fingers reaching for a strand of her hair.

"Don't you touch her!" screeched MKLois. "Who knows who that bitch was with!"

TW's eyes went wide as the words sunk in deep.

"You don't deserve to breathe the same air as her!" yelled TH still struggling.

"Lois!" gritted DCClark. "It's between them!"

TH turned to him. "No, it's not! How can you even say that? We're all in danger. CR was attacked by their abomination of a character!"

"Don't they understand that they just can't willy nilly create something and send it out into the universe! There are checks and balances in place for the safety of all, past, present and future!" stated MK a bit more calmly. "Stupid people. Piss poor writing."

"They're destroying all of us," whispered TH as NN rocked EDLois in her arms. "Every Lois that ever existed. They are insulting us . . . to the core."

ED pulled away from NN and wiped her face. "Okay. That's enough. I'm done with sad . . . let's move on. Clark, tell me what happened."

Everyone in the room was taken aback at her abrupt change. ED gave TW a slight grin. "DC is right. It is our mess. So let me hear it. I'll try not to slug you too hard."

"You've got a good woman there, Clark Kent," said CR with a grin.

"Yea, I know," said TW with hope in his eyes. "Okay, here goes. MK is right. SVLana lived with Bizarro for a month and never knew it wasn't me. I was stuck here, imprisoned by Jor-El. SVLana killed Bizarro even though he told her he loved her. So yea, I probably should be tested for some kind of alien STD. Ollie has mentioned Star Labs and there's a new doctor at Metro Gen, Emil Hamilton, maybe he can help with that."

"Bizarro?"

"Yea, the guy who grabbed your ass last season."

"I slapped him . . ."

"And SVLana had sex with him, and apparently liked it better with him than me," he said as he cleared his throat. "The reason I know that is . . . when I offered to 'have another go' after smashing the bed, she got dressed and wanted to play superhero."

"Whoa," said MK with a cringe.

"That's hard for a guy to admit," said CR to his Lois.

"Yea, I know. He's mustering a few points."

ED gave her a backwards glance that said 'be quiet.'

"Sorry," shrugged the Lois from the movies.

"Sooo, apparently . . . SVLana had already been to Metropolis several times before the wedding and didn't look me up. She ran into Chloe who kept it hush hush. And she trained with some guy to make her 'invincible.' Yea, whatever. And the guy was looking out for her the whole time after she quit training. She wanted power."

"Yea, she said that a lot," interrupted CRClark who held up a blocking hand. "Sorry."

'Yea. So anyway, she persuaded people with her money she stole from Lex and other things to get her into this power suit that Lex had been developing so he could live. It's built into the skin and afterwards she had superspeed and superstrength. She wanted power. Oh, yea, I guess I already said that. Well, like CR said, she said that a lot. I mean . . . A LOT!" He ventured to take EDLois' hand and she allowed it. "You know how they write me when I'm around her. Ball-less. Brainless. A 14 year old with hormones."

"Bastards!" said TH as DC hugged her and kissed her forehead.

"Pretty much," sighed TWClark. "So she got the suit and then she twisted me around her little finger like always. I just stood there like a big dumb alien and took it like a wimp ass. But . . . uh . . . this is hard for me to say."

"What?" said EDLois trying to fight the fear in her gut.

"Uh, guys. Again with the holding," said TW as they grabbed their Lois'.

"Oh no, bend over here it comes again," said DCClark as the color drained from NN and GR's faces. Their family was taking a beating.

"I kissed SVLana on the roof of the Daily Planet building at sunrise."

"Perfect! I'm going to hunt that bitch down and kick her sorry ass," seethed MKLois.

"I'll help!" said TH equally as angry. "I don't give a rat's ass if she is super. We'll find a way."

NN screamed until the crystals shook. "NO MORE!!! I CAN'T TAKE THIS CRAP ANY MORE!!!" She grabbed her Clark by his S. "Clark, you have to do something! They're destroying our story. WE are the Daily Planet!!!"

"I know, honey, but what can I do?" he said feeling hopeless which was a foreign emotion to him.

"I'm sorry, guys, truly I am," said TWClark feeling the burden of his show on the mythos.

"Okay. What else? There's always more when it comes to her. They really pulled out all the stops this time, didn't they?" said EDLois looking into TWClark's eyes.

He nodded. "Chloe wanted me to kill Lex and apparently she killed that guy you dated in IDENTITY. Oliver apparently killed Lex and was happy about it."

"What a minute. Oliver killed Lex?" said ED in shock.

"Yea, Lex is dead."

"Uhhh, Clark, think. Lex had an army of clones at his disposal. Don't tell me he wouldn't use one of those," said the savvy reporter.

"Well, maybe, but that's not how it went down during the episode. And believe me, there was no where for those episodes to go, but down." He shifted his weight. "When SVLana has to convince me not to kill because she's on a superior moral level than I am. . ."

"Definite bullshit," growled GR.

"Tell me about the loft scene," said EDLois. "There's always a loft scene with some kind of whiney, mopey music playing.

"Well, like I said I begged her to stay even though she was killing me with her kryptonite radiation. And I stumbled my way to her still acting all mopey and wimp ass and then I kissed her and . . . well it was a kiss of death. I was basically committing suicide because . . . y'know, she's the most powerful being in the universe . . . literally. And I did whisper 'I love you,' when she was out of earshot and I was dying on the floor of the loft."

"That is so wrong," said DC shaking his head.

"She can kill a Clark and that's their way of ending your relationship? That's not really an ending. Y'know they are going to have her back if she'll come back – and she'll be all cured . . ." said CR.

"And the question of whether or not you two will get back together will not be resolved . . ." said TH biting her lip in apprehension.

"Over my dead body!" said EDLois.

"Shhh," shushed TW. "Don't say that. You don't know who's listening. You weren't there. They're bat shit crazy. They'll do anything and everything when it comes to SVLana."

"Stomping all over a 71 year old story like that. They ought to get the Mussolini treatment!" snarled MKLois.

"I like your style," grinned GRClark.

"Thanks," she smiled back.

"So what happened to make all this come about," asked NNLois chuckling at her Clark.

"Well, SVLana had to come back to finish out her episodes from last season," started EDLois.

"And, here's something else you should know," said TWClark to his Lois. "Two of the writer/producers are leaving and moving on to a revamped teen soap opera. They're the ones who wrote the power suit episode."

"Oh goodie!" said ED sarcastically. "So how is it going to be . . . between us, I mean, when I get back?"

"I think they're going to sweep all this SVLana stuff under the rug."

"Typical. Too bad our fans had to live through it . . . and you, of course." She gave him a wink. "And will I be second choice?" asked ED with an eyebrow rising to her forehead.

"No! Never! You are the right choice and the only choice for me. Hopefully our fans will see how much my character grows when I'm with you and try to forget how much I regressed when I was with . . . y'know."

"I'll make ya work for it," she grinned as they hugged.

"I wouldn't want it any other way," he smiled the Kent smile. "I will love you forever and always, no matter what. . . . always know that in your heart. I don't care what they make me say or do on the show. My heart and life are yours, Lois."

The three other couples came over to them and hugged them. "As long as Clark has his Lois, there's hope."

Ding, dong the bitch is dead. Let's move on to the rest of the Season 8 we were promised. The Lois and Clark of it all. And, oh yea, Doomsday.


End file.
